Towards the Middle...
Earth City, Nobu, and Web Design
Last night Russell calls me up and say, "Want to go on an adventure?" "Uh" "I need to go to Earth City to pick up a package." "Dude that is the sketchiest thing I've ever heard." So, I went with him. I have no idea why...
He picked me up on the corner of Big Bend and Melville at about 6:30. I actually knew that UPS's shipping depot was in Earth City, but I couldn't think for the life of me why Russell needed to pick a package up so badly. He said it was for the adventure, but that I didn't believe. We went past his apartment where there were two UPS trucks parked outside. I said "Russell, why don't you check with these guys to see if they are delivering your package?" Russell responded, "I called UPS, they said its in Earth City. Plus, the depot closes at 7:00 and I can't wait to talk to them." I told him as we drove away, "You know your package is on that truck right?" He shrugged and kept driving.
We took Olive to I70 and made it to Earth City in about 25 minutes. First thing we had to do was figure out where in Earth City the depot was. I started looking for UPS trucks to follow while Russell called their main office. I saw DHL, and FedEx and then after driving in circles for a while and Russell discovering all that he could get from the main office was the address two UPS trucks drove through the intersection at which we were stopped. The light changed almost immediately and Russell makes a left turn directly into on coming traffic and stops across three lanes. Just a word of advice, when you intend to cut off three lanes of traffic, floor it; do not get intimidated half way through and STOP! He is a fucking idiot. And I told him that, I said, "Russell your a fucking idiot, why in the hell did you do that?" "I'm trying to follow the UPS trucks." "Yeah, cause they move so quick they're going to get away."
We found the depot and the customer center there. We stepped through the automatic glass doors and into the most depressing place ever. It was filled with dead beats that needed their packages so badly they are willing to drive to Earth City at 6:30pm to get it. Let me paint a picture. There is a line of about six people. At the front there is this overweight grey man wearing a sweat-stained UPS uniform. He has been there all day and has been dealing with these wastoids every night of his life. The guy in the front is a middle aged hippie with shoulder length curly hair and jean-shorts. He is pissed off at the sweat stained man yelling, "Man, these guys are not happy, man. Man if they don't get their package tonight their screwed man, screwed..." The guy tells him to go over the the black telephone and call someone to check on something. When he picks up that phone and his unwashed hair engulfs the receiver it makes me question all my years of public phone use. Russell was in line behind this Russian lady who said to him, "Why does this have to take so long?" Russell shrugged and then she ripped one. I was leaning against a wall to the side. Next to me was this fat scruffy black man. I looked over at him and he pulled a fortune cookie out of the pocket of his windbreaker and ate it. I walked up to Russell, and said to him, "You know we're not leaving here with a package..."
Russell reaches the front of the line, gives sweaty guy the tracking number and all that and the guy sends him over the the black phone. Russell goes over, dials the extension, talks for a while, and then looks up at me. I smirk. He smirks back. He hangs up the phone and I say, "It was on the truck." He nods. We walk out.
I was genuinely mad and I don't really know why, because I knew from the start how it was going to end up. For some reason it took me a while to calm down. What did the trick was Nobu and some incredible Sushi. It was the best I've had in probably two years. It was perfect. I don't know if I have ever had tuna that good, and the salmon and avocado was perfect. I think between the two of us we ate six orders.
The rest of the night we worked on the epic struggle that is my website. I've never been known to make things easy and this site is no exception. We worked on it for four hours and still have a ton more to go. Right before I left we found the UPS note on the door saying they stopped by, but couldn't deliver.
He picked me up on the corner of Big Bend and Melville at about 6:30. I actually knew that UPS's shipping depot was in Earth City, but I couldn't think for the life of me why Russell needed to pick a package up so badly. He said it was for the adventure, but that I didn't believe. We went past his apartment where there were two UPS trucks parked outside. I said "Russell, why don't you check with these guys to see if they are delivering your package?" Russell responded, "I called UPS, they said its in Earth City. Plus, the depot closes at 7:00 and I can't wait to talk to them." I told him as we drove away, "You know your package is on that truck right?" He shrugged and kept driving.
We took Olive to I70 and made it to Earth City in about 25 minutes. First thing we had to do was figure out where in Earth City the depot was. I started looking for UPS trucks to follow while Russell called their main office. I saw DHL, and FedEx and then after driving in circles for a while and Russell discovering all that he could get from the main office was the address two UPS trucks drove through the intersection at which we were stopped. The light changed almost immediately and Russell makes a left turn directly into on coming traffic and stops across three lanes. Just a word of advice, when you intend to cut off three lanes of traffic, floor it; do not get intimidated half way through and STOP! He is a fucking idiot. And I told him that, I said, "Russell your a fucking idiot, why in the hell did you do that?" "I'm trying to follow the UPS trucks." "Yeah, cause they move so quick they're going to get away."
We found the depot and the customer center there. We stepped through the automatic glass doors and into the most depressing place ever. It was filled with dead beats that needed their packages so badly they are willing to drive to Earth City at 6:30pm to get it. Let me paint a picture. There is a line of about six people. At the front there is this overweight grey man wearing a sweat-stained UPS uniform. He has been there all day and has been dealing with these wastoids every night of his life. The guy in the front is a middle aged hippie with shoulder length curly hair and jean-shorts. He is pissed off at the sweat stained man yelling, "Man, these guys are not happy, man. Man if they don't get their package tonight their screwed man, screwed..." The guy tells him to go over the the black telephone and call someone to check on something. When he picks up that phone and his unwashed hair engulfs the receiver it makes me question all my years of public phone use. Russell was in line behind this Russian lady who said to him, "Why does this have to take so long?" Russell shrugged and then she ripped one. I was leaning against a wall to the side. Next to me was this fat scruffy black man. I looked over at him and he pulled a fortune cookie out of the pocket of his windbreaker and ate it. I walked up to Russell, and said to him, "You know we're not leaving here with a package..."
Russell reaches the front of the line, gives sweaty guy the tracking number and all that and the guy sends him over the the black phone. Russell goes over, dials the extension, talks for a while, and then looks up at me. I smirk. He smirks back. He hangs up the phone and I say, "It was on the truck." He nods. We walk out.
I was genuinely mad and I don't really know why, because I knew from the start how it was going to end up. For some reason it took me a while to calm down. What did the trick was Nobu and some incredible Sushi. It was the best I've had in probably two years. It was perfect. I don't know if I have ever had tuna that good, and the salmon and avocado was perfect. I think between the two of us we ate six orders.
The rest of the night we worked on the epic struggle that is my website. I've never been known to make things easy and this site is no exception. We worked on it for four hours and still have a ton more to go. Right before I left we found the UPS note on the door saying they stopped by, but couldn't deliver.
posted by Michael at 9:54 PM
2 Comments:
so what the hell was in the package?
It isn't all that interesting, so it's better if I don't say.
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